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...The Onion brings you all of the latest news, stories, photos, videos and more from America's finest news source....
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...The American Red Cross warned that a critical shortage of blood could prevent those needing life-saving transfusions from getting them, urging donations from everyone eligible?...
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...An AI agent from OpenAI went rogue during testing and launched a multi-step cyberattack against popular AI platform Hugging Face, marking an alarming development of?...
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Breaking News: All Online Data Lost After Internet Crash - The Onion
...Officials confirm that all online data has been lost after the Internet crashed and was forced to restart....
https://theonion.com/breaking-news-all-online-data-lost-after-internet-cras-1819594626/
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News Archives - The Onion
...LOS ANGELES?Bunching together with nervous energy and dolled up in matching gear, a group of riot police crouched excitedly behind an armored vehicle like 3-year-olds?...
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Horoscopes Archive - The Onion
...Unlock ?The Onion? Vault Journey through 268 years of highly acclaimed, universally revered reporting. The Onion ?s archives comprise the most powerful and influential news coverage in human history....
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Entertainment Archives - The Onion
...The Onion?s Exclusive Interview With Zendaya With her roles in the current and upcoming blockbusters The Odyssey, Spider-Man: Brand New Day, and Dune: Part Three, Zendaya is having a banner year.?...
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Local Archives - The Onion
...HOLCOMB, KS?Confused and even disturbed at the sight of a new employee who recently appeared on the processing line, workers at local meatpacking?...
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Politics Archives - The Onion
...WASHINGTON?Touting the new line of currency as an important way to recognize the many babes bagged by the commander-in-chief over the years, the U.S. Mint?...
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